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| FOCUS Archives: A select article from FOCUS, Fall 1998, the newsletter of the ADDA. |
Worry and
ADD |
I write books about conditions I know firsthand. Having ADD myself, I wrote Driven to Distraction and Answers to Distraction in an attempt to help others with that particular syndrome, a syndrome that the readers of this publication know well! In my most recent book, Worry: Controlling It and Using It Wisely (Pantheon, 1997) I turned to a new topic: worry, in its many forms. Why did I write that book? Because I am a big-time worrier, of course! (Or at least I used to be before I wrote the book!) One of the rewards of writing Worry was finding out firsthand that there are a lot of remedies for toxic worry that actually work, and that excessive worrying really can be brought under control most of the time for most people. This is really good news, news that unfortunately most people do not yet know about. The real goal in dealing with worry is not to get rid of it entirely - indeed the absence of worry is a dangerous state itself, called denial - but the goal is to get rid of unnecessary, corrosive worry. Worry is like blood pressure: you need some to survive. Too much, however, is toxic. Indeed, it can kill you. Do people with ADD worry more than other people? I think they (we) do. Part of the reason is that ADD'ers tend to be smart and imaginative, and smart and imaginative people worry a lot. Why? Because it takes a sharp, creative mind to think up all the negative possibilities we worriers contend with every day! But there are other reasons worry tends to sink its tentacles into the ADD brain more than into others. ADD leaves us facing potential danger, if not disaster, all the time. We are always wondering: What did we forget? What might we say wrong? What did we not hear at the key business meeting we just attended? What bills have been unpaid? How much longer can we put off taking care of the backyard, our dentist appointment, the piles that are crowding us out of house and home, the bright idea that we intended to act on weeks, or is it now months ago??!! Those of us who have ADD had better be good worriers, because we inevitably have a lot to worry about, at least until we learn how to manage our ADD effectively (it can be done!!!, but don't feel bad, no one does it perfectly or without sweat). Indeed, one of the keys to managing ADD well is learning how to worry wisely! The wise worrier uses worry as a danger signal to take action on, as opposed to ignoring, or just brooding over. Wise worry is a key to success in life for everyone, really. As Andrew Grove, the former head of Intel Corp. said, "Only the paranoid survive!" You don't have to be paranoid, just vigilant. Watch out for danger signals, and when you see them, take corrective action. Don't just brood. Don't get lost in what I call "the infinite web of what-if" as you contemplate the ominous core of life. Your mind will play tricks on you, your imagination will lead you into dark forests, you will get lost in worry after worry if you are not careful to avoid toxic patterns. These are my five major keys to good worrying: I. NEVER WORRY ALONE!!!! This is by far the most important principle. Talk to someone, anyone, when you feel worried. II. GET THE FACTS. Toxic worry is usually based on lack of information or misinformation. III. MAKE A PLAN. Once you have the facts, take action. Make a plan to remediate the situation, whatever it might be. Even if the plan fails, you will feel better being active rather than passive. IV. CHANGE YOUR PHYSICAL STATE. Walk around. Run up and down stairs. Do some jumping jacks. Go out for a run. Play tennis. Any change in your physical state, especially exercise, will change your brain's chemistry. This is like pushing the re-set button on your brain. V. CONSULT A PROFESSIONAL. There are many kinds of toxic worry that most people do not know about, just as they didn't know about ADD a decade ago. Consult a professional to see if you have one of these. They are all treatable. This is really good news. Take advantage of it! The story on worry is a much happier one than ever before. Now we have remedies that work! Just as knowledge and treatment have made new lives for millions of people with ADD, so can knowledge and treatment make new lives for tens of millions of worriers. Before closing, let me just say to you readers who have ADD yourselves, or know someone who does, TAKE HEART. Every day in my office I see another adult or child who is succeeding at levels higher than they ever thought possible as they learn how to manage their ADD. This condition need not be a curse. Indeed, managed properly it can become a major asset! That is not to say ADD cannot cause problems. Poorly managed, ADD can end you up in jail. But properly managed, it can put you on top of the world. GOOD LUCK!!! P.S. If you want to reach me personally, or subscribe to my newsletter, MIND MATTERS, call me at my office in Concord, MA at 978-287-0810, or E-mail me at EHallowell@aol.com |
| (c) 1998 National Attention Deficit Disorder Association |